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Hi, Sarah! If you got this mail, it's the 28^th, merry Christmas and Happy New Year, by the way, you can tell mom that her son has kept up with family tradition and got the shit end of the stick, without leaving a corpse, of course, of course. Call the number I texted you, leave a message if you hit voicemail, and say you're calling from me, ask for an E-mail address to forward this to.

Special Agent's Log, Star Date… I'm so funny. I have no time to properly enter this in the log, and I don't know when, correction, if I will be able to do so. Recording summary of 21 December 2007 activities. Happy winter solstice to all you pagans out there. Another glorious day of ViCap making the Keystone Cops look like top law enforcement personnel. Anderson was lost this morning – the revenge of the pharaohs. Definite proof that you should not use Egyptian tap water, not even to water down your single malt. FBI should apply for emergency funding for excessive toilet paper use. This is not for the record, by the way.

Current status: special agents gearing up for war. I have an M4 on loan from friends of mine. Every Marine is a rifleman, son. Sir, yes, drill sergeant, sir! Plus a  45 auto with safety bullets. You can't make up that shit – safety bullets. In the same category as virginal screwing. This morning Landsdell came up with a reasonable thought. Irrefutable proof that the world is coming to an end. Morning spent in cooking up schemes to contact Professor Abba, most of which involved putting surveillance equipment in underwear. Then off to the National Museum to inspect crime scene. Crime scene contained remains of head of late, lamented professor Marks. Whoever did him knew what he was doing. That's a comfort – professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous. We recovered a bullet (.45 Black Talon), a business card with just a name – Sir Aubrey Pennyhew, a metallic object, about 6 inches long, three inches wide, three inches thick. Object will start glowing when in continuous contact with human flesh, unfold in non-Euclidian way, and emit light. Sergeant Khalid was kind enough to demonstrate. Team then split – Pierce, Chance, Chang to Ministry of Interior to analyze the find. I spoke to the Museum's curator, Dr. Abbas, Landsdell stayed in the car. Nothing much from Abbas – Pennyhew was killed in the 1920s, Abbas has not spoken to professor Abba since 2002, Professor Abba is surrounded by extremists, and he may have become one. His minders hate Americans, no explanation why Abba agreed to speak to Marks. News from FG. 3/25 probably awakened something. 3 Recon not directly involved, but perhaps collaterally. FG's concerned for my health. FG thinks I may catch flak from all sides. Majestic loons to the left of me, green Greek jokers to the right, and here I am, stuck in the middle with me. FG gave me some blue vitamins. Further in the news: a lot of .45 black talon headaches in the antique trade.

Keystone moment of the day – plan to convince Professor Abba to see us by having Chance, wired up, in a burqa, get a message to him with pictures of the puzzle box. Lament Configuration, if you want, because we lamented it. Chance got hassle from the sword wielding goons, plus the imam, plus Egyptian local police. Now resorting to plan F, F for FUBAR. Puzzle box contains vials of chemicals, compo unknown, Chang checked. Reputedly a dangerous way to contact Professor Abba, but the Greeks assure me it will work. Anderson is better, ordered everyone to Defcon 1. Hence the Kevlar and the Colt. Back in the shit. Martikian signing off.